Archive for May, 2007

My Life seems worth nothing at all.


Worthless, a disgrace and undoubtingly a disaster!


A life full of confusion, hatred, and darkness.


How will it end …………………….


How will it end ……..


Will it end with,

a tie on the neck,

drugs or cyanide to drink,


a cut on the pulse……



whhahahaha…… now which is it???


Might be a HIT and RUN,

gunshot through the HEAD between my two eyes…….


a never ending sleep……….



A life’s lost…. Another useless life lost…..


Drained of everything that’s happenning in my life….. Felt like everything I strive for is for nothing…nothing at all….


My Heart bleeds….. wounded by the very people I had love…. Now I love again… But this TRUE love I can not grasp into… I’m afraid to loose it, for I’ll loose myself again… But I can never be free…. And the only way to be free is to … is to loose this life… and forever LOVE my TRUE LOVE…….


Forever will never be forever until this borrowed life is……ended.


Alas well see each other in the next life……………..creafilgo


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Test of TIME

Our life was too short that we never did realized it sometimes just ends. Why is that? Well maybe, we were too busy of too many little things we see in this world. Our attention can be easily distracted by our cellphone, car, clothes, houses, and other petty material things. We don’t usually invest on long term things. We usually like it quick and easy like in ready to eat food and drinks. We work hard to earn and buy all these things. May it be for pleasure or need.

We’re all just busy… busy… busy…

Come to think of it, it was always been like this since you breathe a LIFE…..

We don’t need to ask why? Why? Duh…. That’s Why!

Answers are sometimes the reasons why we ask questions and that makes us busy, struggling in our lives.

Because of the knowledge we want to gain, and not the wisdom we must achieve.

Yes. We must do it, for the world works that way. And that is simply saying, that we don’t have a CHOOSE.

But we do, actually. Because each individual curves it’s destiny in every unique way he or she can. They do not just install microchips in their heads and follow another mindless robot… And that’s why we made mistakes on our lives… because were not robots but HUMANS.

Sometimes, people with no respect to himself looses everything. Even the ones he or she loves. Sometimes, I think we should stop for a little while….smell the fresh breeze of life. And I know a lot of people who would like to do it but cannot.

Reason is, there’s no time for it. Because they never created a time for it.

That’s why life is short and that we never enjoyed every moment of it.. Only a few moments which we tend to forget after the age of 40.

One lesson is to make every moment count….. For you don’t know while walking on a side walk, a skateboarder passes by and is destined to hit you in any circumstances possible. And when you fall down you hit your head on a dog’s poop and you can no longer get up… PERMANENTLY!

If you want to love, give it all in a clean way… And never think of any drawbacks or consequences…as long as your happy and you’ve enjoy the moment….do it. The next day, do it again..and again and again…..like ENERGIZER!

Love is anything and everything… You can never loose in love. For its not a battle to be fought but a moment to nurture and cherish. Love is Universal…so it goes to all sexes and all types of love…. Spend time with the people you love and not the things you love! Let them be a part of you. And you’ll never regret each moment.

Love is and always will be sacred and anything not sacred that you use to call love is not love at all —– creafilgo

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Beyond my OCEAN

I walked upon the shore of my sea and none on my seashore I see captivates me. My seashore holds nothing but black sand. Rocks as red as blood and when I look up, the sky is tainted black and thick as a crude oil. Not one proof of life, and no one dares to live.


This seashore was mine, mine alone. My life flows like smashing sea water, bursting and crushing to one another. No one knows my path, even I who controls it. My grief and fears, engulfs me. Eating me slowly. But by this I was strong, became fearless. My is heart filled with patience… understanding… love… but my seashore holds no boundaries…. anyone can live here, but they never stayed.


My fear affects them… They do not fear me… But fear my seashore… For It has the power to break the people I love and cherish the most.


Why not leave this seashore, and explore my OCEAN. What stops me from getting off this land…. Is it fear? Or simply HOPE! Hope that gives me the capability to break every rule I know…. Rules of Love, Trust, Respect, Friendship & Family.


Within my lifetime, I was a silent prodigal son. A bastard, insane psycho because of LOVE and Relationship. My seashore…. Destroys me… made me my own MONSTER!


I grief every moment of it…. I destroyed my life… It was like suicide…. Blood flowing from my eyes as my tears keeps dropping. My life ended…when I begun to LOVE!


What’s this…. a glimpse of shining light clearing away a portion of my dark sky… shining on my face…. yes… I see it… HOPE. HOPE that prisons me now will make me FREE…


I have to break free, away from my seashore, away from my sea. I pick up my pace and began to move towards the water… slowly… water rises up beyond me… I felt drowning, but no I’m not going to die…alone..unhappy…beyond my seashore, beyond my sea, is an open OCEAN…. that will totally give me my FREEDOM!


Giving me my life back, my love, respect, patience and understanding. Returning my Friends and Family. This is where I should be, in my OCEAN!



No Land can bind a FREE MAN………… creafilgo

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